Pre-children, Zac and I used to argue over who did the food shop. It was an unwelcome weekend chore that got in the way of sleep, watching films, going for pub lunches and more sleep.
Nowadays I normally make Zac take Theo on a Saturday morning, because a) he’s a tight arse and therefore spends less money than me, b) it counts as an outing for Theo, and c) because it’s tricky for me to take both the children on my own during the week. By the time you’ve put a toddler and a baby in a trolley you have just enough room left for a packet of ham and a tube of toothpaste.
Today, however, I was given the ultimate treat of going food shopping ON MY OWN! It’s been such a long time since I’ve done this. I don’t know why I used to hate it so much. It was just so lovely not to feel rushed for once.
In preparation I made a really healthy shopping list and made plans to make lots of delicious meals from scratch. I tend not to put anything too exotic on the list when Zac goes because he usually ends up ringing me in a frantic rage asking what the hell something is, implying that I’ve made the item up in my head (last time he got all huffy with me because he didn’t know what an avocado was). So the first thing I did when I got there was make a beeline for the fruit and veg and started to slowly peruse the aubergines (why does that sound a tad filthy?).
It was then that I glanced down at my 3 page shopping list and gave myself a bit of a reality check. Was I really going to find the time to make all our meals from scratch this week? Probably not. And even if I did have the time, could I be arsed? Definitely not. So, feeling totally outrageous I folded my wedge of paper in half and slipped it back into my handbag. I was going to do the food shop WITHOUT A SHOPPING LIST! (As I rid myself of my list I’m sure I heard a few shocked gasps from the other mums in the nearby vicinity). God I know how to live on the wild side.
Long story short, I’ve attached a picture of my purchased goods. Let’s just say, the healthy eating agenda hasn’t exactly gone to plan. It’s what I call a ‘give a shit’ shopping trolley. Feeling extremely guilty for depriving Theo of meals rich in nutrients for the next week, I bought him a Thomas magazine as a peace offering. I ended up with a shitload of unhealthy food, a pair of ski trousers, a ball of wool and some paint brushes, all for £86.24; thank you Aldi, you weird, random place. (When I got home Zac was not too impressed, he normally keeps the cost below £60. Scrooge).
I then got to play shopping bag Tetris trying to get everything into the bloody car. With two car seats, a buggy and a pram taking up nearly all of the room, most of the food shop was piled up on the passenger seat.
Since when did the most exhilarating part of my week become the food shop on a Saturday afternoon? Such fun.